Ghost of Benjamin Orr says, “I Was Frozen Out of Cars Reunion” 

Not everybody is excited about the reunion of 80’s hitmakers, the Cars. In fact, some call it hardly a reunion at all.

“They never reached out to me once. Those guys were my brothers. I don’t deserve to be treated this way in this realm or any other.” says the Cars’ former singer/bassist, Benjamin Orr, via a Ouija Board in KGRA’s offices.  “This ‘reunion’ is a fraud as far as I’m concerned.”

The group has released its first album in 24 years, “Move Like This”, to strong reviews and is playing several festivals this summer.

“I hate to play the ‘death’ card, but this is a case of discrimination, pure and simple.”

Orr is referring to his death in 2000 from pancreatic cancer.

“I don’t see why me being dead means that all of sudden I’m out of the running for a reunion. It seems rather small-minded and little mercenary if you ask me.”

When pressed on how the currently non-corporeal Orr would even be able to participate in a Cars reunion if he were asked, he offers a surprising answer.

“Mediums—pure and simple.  I would most likely take control over a willing vessel and use their body to sing and play.  There are so many of those paranormal TV shows now, I just know that I could find at least one of those guys who knew their way around a bass.”

The group did offer their former member a tribute of sorts via a dedication on their new album, but Orr is unimpressed.

  ” Puh-leeze.  ‘Ben, your spirit was with us on this one.’  What a crock.  This is a power play by Elliot Easton.  He’s always been jealous of my talent.  Trust me; my spirit was nowhere near that album.  I’m not omniscient, jerks.  I don’t know who is singing ‘Just What I needed’ or ‘Drive’ at the live shows, but I bet they suck ass.  Trust me; they will be summoning me any day now.”

KGRA contacted the Cars’s management for comment, and received this statement

“As much as we would love to have Benjamin participate in this reunion, there is currently no feasible way for him to do so.  Benjamin, please, go into the light.  Love, the Cars”

Orr is undeterred.

Guys, don’t make me haunt you.  I can break glasses and knock over guitars all day.  I am currently haunting the site of a former Sam Goody in Kenosha, Wisconsin.  It’s a bubble tea/pho place now.  The minute I figure out how to break free, I’m coming for you guys.”